Oh, Crap…

In life, we always expect more than we should, only to end up in disappointment. We keep wanting the best out of everything, only to get nothing in the end. And when we do end up with the crappy things in life, we tend to complain and drown ourselves in self-pity. It’s like a sedative, almost euphoric in some ways too. It provides us with solace, and at the same time, contempt. But we like it anyway. Sure, it’s easier to blame someone else for all the trouble we go through, but sometimes, blaming ourselves is just what the doctor ordered. I guess you can call it penance for our guilty souls. Our conscience finds it unbearable to come across such unfathomable circumstances in our lives, and we really only have ourselves to blame for it. It’s the way of Karma. No matter how hard we stare it in the eye, it will follow us home, just to bite at our asses.

But if we’ve already repented for our bad choices, bad judgments, and bad everything else, why do crappy things keep happening in our lives? At some point in time, isn’t everyone entitled to the good stuff? We try and we try, and yes, we do try some more, yet somehow our asses just keep getting bitten. Until we find that the question has now become, how long do we hope for change?

Yes, there are times when wallowing in our own self-pity seems to provide us with a sense of comfort. But if we keep doing it over and over, doesn’t it just get tired? In addition, it really does nothing for the ego. It brings us down even further, and when we’ve hit rock bottom, suddenly we find it very hard to get back up. And isn’t it always harder to let others see these moments of weakness and vulnerability? Because, let’s face it, all of us are predatory scavengers. We take what we can, and we gobble it down. It’s always better to see yourself on top, looking down on others, making them feel lower than they already are. The humiliation that we manage to scrounge from them is somehow gratifying for our human natures.

Somehow, buried deep within the twisted recesses of our very beings, we love pity. We bask in the glory of it. That’s why we keep taking so much crap in our lives. We put up with it for all we’re worth. The thing is, it’s just too much. Life will always present us with crap. And if we want to stop receiving crappy things in life, isn’t it high time we stop accepting crap and demand something more instead? Like I always used to say, life is like a box of crap, you never know what you’re stepping on until you’re already in deep shit.

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~ by iamnotfrodo on September 3, 2006.

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